It’s My Party and I’ll Cry if I Want To

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You see that little two year old up there ⇑? Well it’s actually his upcoming 3rd birthday and party planning that has led me to cry a few times lately. It’s amazing to me how quickly things can spiral out of control when trying to plan a party for a toddler who in all reality is probably not going to remember 1/10th of it!

I will be the first to admit that for his 1st birthday party I turned into a Pinterest mommy monster. You know the type of mom/party planner that says, “No you can’t have a Mickey Mouse party because mommy saw this other idea that’s cuter.” I pinned idea after idea to help make his Fiesta the best around. (I’m sure that made my Pinterest mommy friends just love hate me!) I ordered his cake 6 months before because I was afraid the best baker in town would not have any availability if I waited. No joke you all I think I was really trying to outdo the waiters at Palenque Grill and all the singing, dancing and hoopla they do when you celebrate a birthday there. I started decorating the house days before with items I had picked up while we were out of town because “there was no way stores here would have them.”

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And yet here I find myself two years later asking myself why and who was that party really for?

You see for the last few weeks we’ve been trying to decide what we were going to do to celebrate his upcoming 3rd birthday. I know, I know, how dare we procrastinate and start planning a few weeks before. Backyard BBQ? Bouncy House? Ever popular Chuck E. Cheese? Rent a party place — that’s right rent out a whole space just for him to run around and play because now there are some just about on every block now.

We finally thought we had it figured out when we decided to join forces with my sister in law and we’d celebrate my soon to be three year old and her soon to be two year old. Perfect we thought since we usually end up inviting the same group of friends. Plus we could cut the cost in half — AWESOME!

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Except then we had to decide on a place we both liked and a date that worked for everyone. Just wait it gets better. You see my sister in law were kind of just moving  right along: picking a theme, deciding on colors, food for the kiddos, cakes, cupcakes, goodie bags and invitations. And then the voice of reason AKA my brother in law stopped us dead in our tracks and asked, “Wait, how much is all this going to be??” Dum, dumm, dummm!

It was quickly party over when we put numbers to all our amazing ideas and we were looking at our bank accounts being about $400 less when all was said and done. Even after splitting costs that was just too much for us to do. Especially since we are just trying to recover from the holidays. We decided that night to sleep on it and start over.

The next morning as I was bringing my husband up to speed with the birthday plans, I stopped and I asked my husband, “Do you remember your 3rd birthday party?” The truth was I didn’t. All I remember is most my parties being spent at my grandma’s house with aunts, uncles and cousins. My grandma would cook, someone would bake a cake and we all had fun. There was no inflatable, no goodie bags, nothing just family and fun. Most times we would spend our time chasing each other around outside. My husband’s  most memorable was spending a birthday at home with a few friends with the best fried chicken in town from Jimmy’s in Edinburg. That’s right a fried chicken party and remembers it to this day.

Why have I been stressing myself out? Is it that darn mommy guilt of having to have “the” party of the month? The party with the best food, the goodie bags or favors that the kids ooh and ahh over, and decorations that people will pin over and over.

Is there a happy medium? There has to be.

For us we’ve decided to set a budget that works for our family. I’ve let go of the fact that we will inevitably go to parties that have way more and way less than we do and that’s ok. It’s what makes them happy and hopefully about what the kids want, not the parents. At the end of the day whether you decide to have inflatables, magicians and face painting or just cake and ice cream we are all mommies who love our little ones to the moon and back, who would walk through fire for them and will give up endless hours of sleep when they are not feeling well. So mommy guilt and your friend inadequacy guess what you will not be receiving an invite to our next party!

2 COMMENTS

  1. I was laughing through the whole article because I am the exact way. I really don’t care about other parties or trying to be better but I find a satisfaction from planning a unique party. I know my son won’t remember his parties but I will and I get to tell him about them. I get to tell him why I chose that theme; what that theme meant to him.

    I do like having the party centered for his age group so I won’t have things that I know he will not enjoy because, after-all, the celebration is for him. That’s how I am able to balance my crazy party planning!

  2. […] Birthdays are my most favorite time of year.  If I’m being honest with you fellow momma friends, in my opinion birthdays should be called birthmonths because that’s how long I like to celebrate!  My daughter recently turned two and I knew that I wanted to have a special celebration for her and her “school” friends.  I booked the venue, picked the theme (Sesame Street) and then got stumped on activities.  I scoured Pinterest and found tons and tons of fun games and activities for children…but that was the problem, children not toddlers!  I was about to give up when I came across “pull-string pinatas.”  Of course, being from the RGV I was familiar with pinatas but had never heard of a pull string…I was intrigued. […]

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